I am fortunate to live in an almost perfect venue for upskirts. The island of Kauai is tropical and the temperature rests at a mean of about 80 Fahrenheit all year around. Because of this, women wear short skirts twelve months out of the year. The island style favors dresses that are flimsy and gauzy as well as extremely short, tourists from colder climates who are unaccustomed to wearing such garments tend to make quite a few mistakes when they’ve got a few mai tais under their belts. To add to the delight, many (perhaps most) buildings in the tourist town of Hanalei are raised several feet off the ground due to excessive flooding during the rainy season. As I walk along the street, I am at eye level with the legs of any woman sitting on the verandah of a restaurant, bar or shop. You can imagine the results. Last summer, for example, I caught sight of a woman sitting at the local burger stand. She was in her early or middle thirties, with bright red hair and an attractive face characterized by thick, pouty lips. She was more than a bit plump, though not precisely fat, and dressed in one of those flimsy little tropical dresses I have already mentioned. When I first spotted her, she was seated next to her husband or boyfriend, munching a burger. Her legs were wide open and I was treated to a luscious view of panties even brighter red than her hair. I lingered in front of the burger stand, pretending to study the sky, the pedestrian traffic, even the cars rolling down the road. I feasted on a view of panties until I felt that I was beginning to look a bit conspicuous just standing there. I circled round the line of shops, returned for another look, but discovered that she was gone. I went on about my business, running some mundane errands. In so doing, I happened to walk by another popular restaurant with a verandah, and there was Big Red again! The burger stand didn’t serve water, and hubby or boyfriend apparently wanted a fire-water, so there they were, and once again those bright red panties flashed in front of my eyes. I watched her raise a glass of brew, her face flushed, big lips parted in a smile. She shook her red hair. This gal just couldn’t seem to keep her legs closed. I circled the restaurant a couple of times without feeling especially conspicuous. After all, Hanalei is full of locals who simply loiter around town all day long. But soon she was gone. Well, it had been a good day. Two sightings within an hour. Time to move on, though. But then I thought to pay a visit to my housekeeper who worked part time at an art gallery. As I approached the gallery, lo and behold! The red-haired flasher was sitting in a rattan chair in front of the gallery while her male companion looked at paintings. She was fanning herself in the hot sun. Once again, her legs were open to reveal a magnificent red triangle in full glory. Shortly after, the man emerged and off they went. I didn’t see them again. But I couldn’t help wondering about it all. A woman can easily flash through carelessness once in a day. If she’s on vacation and feeling loose, maybe twice. But three times within an hour? And splendid views in every case? I can’t help thinking she was doing it on purpose.